‘How can you return home?’
I had a family, a big income, and stayed in first-class hotels while jetting off to NYC and and Hawaii. When people faced a crisis, they called me back then. I was the Naval Instructor, combat Veteran, who got invited to eat lunch with the President,, later after the Navy I became an educated business financial consultant, the ex-Navy combat Vet with a chest full of medals.
Yet few knew that I was was facing my own crisis. Something was happening to me that neither me, nor my wife or family, could understand: There was hardly a day when I wasn’t thinking about the secrets I left in Gulf war, Desert Shield, Desert Strom..
“How can I return home to Jacksonville, if you’ve never left Iraq the Gulf, and never left my shipmates who died ? I ounce wrote about this and my PTSD a few years ago…
Im 43 now, with little hair, a scruffy goatee sometimes, a Budda Belly and a calm, measured way of talking, Yes me,,, calm,,, but the fatigue of being away from my son Noah, and daughter Claudia,, all these years can be seen in the lines under my eyes. I’ve been sorting through my war memories for over the past 16 years.
I first tried to purge them, by just saying im fine, then by being numb and detached, then taking pills, then by running… then by drinking,,, then by fighting… nothing worked like Meditation, EMDR, and AA. Daily Meditation…
I work hard today,, as a advocate for peace,, not war!,, ending hunger, ending poverty, thru my relationship with “The Venus Project” www.thevenusproject.com . I’ve been out here in Los angeles, CA. kinda ended up here after all my running.. My kids estranged from there Dad. I considered, working in film, working in other Countries teaching English, everything,, I didnt consider going home.. why right? IDK,, facing my past I guess.. til my son Noah reached out and said,, when you coming?
Im very proud to say,, Tuesday the 27 AUG 2013.. I return to my former home of Jacksonville, Florida,, for good,, to be the best Dad I can be at this point in my life.. Not the man I ounce was, but a new man.. filled with love, not hate, Today,, I forgive myself,, with open my arms,, and with all my soul… return to being the Dad my kids want and need me to be…
I love you
Noah Thompson and Claudia Thompson – Dad
Harboring anger and hatred toward anyone guarantees that you remain in low energy fields where problems will continue to crop up repeatedly in your life. I suggest that you examine every relationship in which you feel judgmental thoughts of anger and hatred. Replace those thoughts with energies of acceptance, kindness, cheerfulness, and love. You will have to make a personal commitment to, first… of all, notice what you are feeling and then exercise your ability to choose to send love. When your heart becomes pure, your enemy becomes your friend, or even more significantly, your teacher. Your worst enemies are your greatest teachers because they allow you to examine the emotions of anger and revenge and then to transcend them. They give you the exact tools you need to elevate yourself to the spiritual energies that provide your solutions.
# Truth … The most effective way to control your focus is through the use of questions. For any question you pose, your brain provides an answer. For example, if you asked “Why is so-and-so taking advantage of me?” you can’t help but focus on how you’re being bilked, whether it’s actually true or not. But if you ask instead, “How can I improve this situation?” you are certain to get answers that enable you to take positive action…. (TR)